I ran across this post and wanted to make a comment.

Every Moment Is Right: Don’t laugh at my fear. I won’t laugh at yours..

This is an example of a sensibility that I (sort of) understand. I see it more and more these days, but respectfully disagree with it as a point of view.  It’s a bridge too far, and contains more anger and harsh judgement at well-meaning people than it should.

Most comments to the effect of  “don’t be afraid” are conveyed in good faith, meant to be helpful, and are communicating hope and help – not negative judgement.

Managing fear used to be an important social concern, not simply a personal one.  The point was to help community members identify actual danger in the world “out there” – at least as much, if not more, than to validate someone’s “right” to their own feelings.  It’s almost always conveyed in a way both accepting of the existence of one’s fears, but, yes, also does suggest that fears can be managed if not overcome.

It’s just not that terrible to have someone suggest, “I don’t think it’s that dangerous. You’ll be OK” The smiling helps reinforce a benign, hopeful message – not a negative judgment.

Ultimately, people struggle successfully, or not so much, with their doubts and fears, and being bothered by what others say (who truly are trying to be helpful) is a wasted side trip – and a bit much, frankly.